I am now at the end of my first trimester.  I barely feel pregnant… but I definately look fat.  Nausea has been bearable, but thanks to Colin, my innards are all stretched and saggy and because of that, as soon as my uterus started to grow, my stretched and saggy innards all got pushed up towards my stomach.  I looked 4 months pregnant at 6 weeks.  Joy.  With Colin, everyone was like “Wow!  You don’t look pregnant at all!”  This time around everyone keeps telling me how ”healthy” I look, and we all know what that means.

  “What a healthy looking dog!  He must have a healthy appetite”

I can’t wait til I can feel the baby kick cuz right now, like I said, I’m just a disgruntled, fat person.  I also can’t wait til we find out if it is a boy or girl.  I don’t know how people can wait til the baby is born to find out.  My friend decided to that, and I feel cheated, even though it’s not my baby or my decision.  I really wanted to know if she’s having a William or an Elle.  As for myself, I can barely wait 20 more days, let alone 6 more months.  According to Dr Evil it is a girl…

Sex-Man – he can determine the sex of your unborn child

Has he ever told you about his superpower?  He can will the sex of a baby.  I know, I know… it sounds ridiculous… but it’s hard to contradict a man who’s 6 for 6 or something.  He says he has willed me a girl.  At first, he wouldn’t even will me a girl.  He said he needed a back up son.  How effed up is that?  It’s effed up to me!  It’s effed up to Colin!  Plus, Dr Evil is so busy at work he says he doesn’t have time to drive a daughter to the library and then back to the convent every day.  I need a daughter.  Every mom should be blessed with a son and a daughter. 

Wish us luck.  Although Dr Evil swears we don’t need luck.